article database‎ > ‎

How can you minister to the transgendered

How can I assume to know if God will heal one from trans-genderism when you have never experienced the trans-gender condition?


When I first started this ministry I determined that I would only minister to Christian wives who find themselves facing a decision on what to do when dealing with their husband’s trans-genderism or cross-dressing behaviour.


Yet I found more and more Christian wives struggling not so much with ‘what should I do’ but with the questions such as or ‘Did God make my husband trans-gendered’ and ‘how do I know if God will heal my husband’.


In other words they were grappling with questions of theology or what the Bible says concerning trans-genderism more than they were querying with how to act.  They wanted to know what stance they should take.  Should they let their husband cross-dressing?  Should they desire or even expect their husband to be healed from cross-dressing and/or their trans-gender feelings?  If their husband wanted to pursue life as another woman, they wanted to know what the likeliness of their husband turning back to remaining in his original manly gender.  They also wanted to know whether it was appropriate to believe God to deliver their husband’s from this unique oppression.


These were also the questions that were most profound when I was struggling to come to terms with my husband’s trans-gender demands.  I wanted to know as a Christian wife what my responsibilities were towards God, towards my husband and towards my children.  Many websites were advocating that I stay with husband even after he transitioned towards a female lifestyle, but if I did this I would have been living a lesbian lifestyle and advocating that lifestyle in front our children.  My faith in Jesus and my prior knowledge of the Scriptures did not permit me to take such a stance.


I knew that God could heal my husband.  I also knew, without a doubt, that God could not create my husband with this desire, for the trans-gender condition was utter confusion, and I knew that confusion could not originate from God.  I also knew that God wanted my husband to be healed and set free from this oppression.  These things I knew even from the most basic Bible knowledge that I had learned as a child. 


Yet it seemed that these questions were at the very crux of what most wives were struggling with.  And so I set my faith to begin to search the Scriptures to discover what God’s mind was regarding trans-genderism and why so little were experiencing the delivering power that I knew was available from God.


Do I need to commit murder to minister to those who have murdered?  Do I need to know every expression of oppression to know what it is like to live under oppression?  No! I simply need to have experienced sin to minister to those who are sinners.  I simply need to have experienced God’s goodness, love and forgiveness so that I may share it with others. That is the basis for all ministry.  Jesus words to the man to whom many demons were cast out are for us also.  "Go home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how good he has been to you." (Mark 5:18).  This man did not stop at just his family, he told his whole town and they were amazed.


Yes, my primary ministry is to Christian wives who are struggling with questions regarding their husband’s trans-gender struggle.  But faith begins where the Word of God is known.  We must know what God’s Word says regarding trans-genderism so that we know how we should regard it.


We know, from God’s word, that we are to show the same compassion that Jesus showed, the same love, the same forgiveness.  When we are fully convinced of Jesus’ power to forgive, heal and restore, we have no problem showing His love to others.  We must remember that it is the goodness of God that leads one to repentance (Romans 2:4).  Let us all therefore be prepared to be changed to be a vessel through which Jesus love may be shown to those who struggle with transgenderism, transsexuality and cross-dressing temptations.